Anxiety, Awareness, Compulsions, depression, Depresssion, intrusive thoughts, Life, Mental Health, mental illness, Obsessions, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, OCD, Rituals, self-help, Thought for the Week, Time to Talk, Well-Being
I’ve been living in a cozy little bubble for months now where my OCD has been kept at bay and it’s component parts compartmentalised into nice neat little virtual boxes in my head. Writing about it in this blog, putting out a small ebook about it , it was almost as if I actually had come so much to terms with it that I was getting to the point where I was forgetting I actually had it! Well, the little bastard has come back with a vengeance and given me a right good punch on the nose this month to remind me it’s gone no fucking where! I’ve struggled like mad and I just don’t know why or what the trigger was. I’ve been ill, I’ve been tired , and work has been emotional with some of the young people I deal with. Maybe all those 3 things together were enough to break through the armour. You just can’t win with this illness, it will keep chipping away until the walls of your defences crack. You will not beat me though!
It’s been a while since I’ve blogged myself rather than shared the viewpoints of others. I suppose once I’d pressed the publish button on Kindle and my short memoir that I named “One Last Time” was out there, I kind of sat back and enjoyed the moment so to speak.
Well, I’m back and somewhat pissed off! It’s dawned on me very recently that there are people out there with no social skills and no filters that ring a bell in their heads that the comments they are about to come out with are…….how shall we put this…..I know , they are best left unsaid! Because people, you cannot hide behind the “banter” banner because your comments quite frankly offend and are down right rude.
On two occasions recently, perfectly normal people who are actually very good friends and have been for a very long time and indeed still will be even after this rant, felt they could make comments in public to me about 1. The glasses I was wearing. What they said was that I looked like Mr Magoo!! and 2. Felt they could pat my stomach and comment on my weight! Two separate incidents and two separate friends, both in their 40’s, not that that really has any bearing.
I can have a laugh and jest and have “banter” with the best of them and anyone that knows me will tell you that I appear to be a happy go lucky chap with a great sense of humour. But at no time have I ever commented on someone’s weight, glasses or all round general appearance. Actually, that’s not entirely true because when I was 13 years of age I called my then 12 year old future wife to be “metal mickey” due to her newly acquired braces for her teeth………but boy have I lived to regret that one!
It struck me that this is in parallel to what we experience as sufferers of OCD. In the year 2014 the general public, media, social media etc still like to poke us in our bellies or comment on our appearance and quirks because they think we are figures of fun, will be killjoys if we don’t laugh a long with their “in joke” about being “a little OCD”…………………..well guess what? We won’t laugh along! We will fight back and educate you parrot fashion until you realise you are simply not funny and you do not have the right!
For the record when I wear my glasses, which is not often, I do look like a chubby Mr Magoo!